They Are/Need Fags

This is what I get to do for the rest of my internet life.

Sit in front of a screen,

Rant to non-existents,

Strengthen my position as Cliche Master.

It's like my Truth Box

Filled with comments I wrote myself

Claiming that pity parties are where you play Beer Pong.

It's Saturday night, which means that the Abend twins

Are probably having a pity party of their own;

From my window I can hear chavs pour beer on their heads

And tell their parents that "Tecate's parents say hello"

And "we just played video games the whole night"

And "I'm really tired so I'm just gonna go to sleep...no I'm fine, just tired.

Yes. I did all my homework yesterday".

Coffee and aspirin they'll beg for coffee and aspirin, Mrs. Abend.

All they need is some coffee, a cigarette and an aspirin.